Earth Day

Today was Earth Day. Did you do anything earthy? Not me. It was Scary Aunt Jean's memorial service, so my cousin and I went to that.

Aunt Jean's granddaughter (who I had never met) did the eulogy. She described a woman I didn't know. From the "she died an old woman" part to the bit where she didn't judge people "as long as you're happy", I have no idea whose life we commemorated. I seem to recall a woman who didn't take any shit and told you where to stick it if you tried to give any to her. She was also totally judgmental. My cousin, my uncles and I kept looking at each other. Did she just not like us? The pastor mentioned her "crusty exterior" and that was it. The pastor actually did know her, since it was her church, so that was nice. I do hate getting the standard eulogy from someone who didn't know the person. I suppose there's not much you can do as a pastor if someone who never went to your church is having their memorial there. Even still...

I did learn a thing or two. For example, I didn't realise she was so involved in charitable causes. I vaguely knew she had run a catering business until she was in her 80's. The pastor noted that she carried a pocketful of loonies on the walk back from the chuch to her retirement home (both in downtown) so that she could give them away. This interested me because when I go walking in downtown, I do exactly that. I call it my panhandler money. Sometimes you think you're the only person who does things...

I look like my mother, everyone said. I do. I'm aware of it. My mother wasn't there today. We're not sure if anyone called her. My mother may not have gone anyway, since she seems to have sworn off family altogether when she decided to be a new and more self-centered better person. Grief, I always come back from these things thinking I should have defended her. I don't really like her husband, though I've tried. "Boorish" comes to mind when I think of him. See also "crude" and "juvenile". I don't like lying, so I have trouble answering questions directly put to me. "Is he nice?" threw me completely. "Yes?" was my answer, which left Auntie Grace in stitches. The point is that I didn't call her. I figured someone else would. She's supposed to be in the big loop. I'm in the secondary loop. I don't get my information first-hand. She's should. But I've tried talking to her about these family things before and her attitude didn't encourage me to do it again. But I feel really guilty that she may not have known and so didn't have the choice to go or not.

Anyway, everyone said how nice it was to see the family again.

I had a thought, though. Because I think weird things at odd moments. All my old aunts are named things like Jean and Margery and Grace and Dorothy. In 3 more generations, there's going to be a lot of Great-Aunt Britneys. That made me giggle.